ora pro nobis

The process of growing up would almost certainly involve these words: realization, leaving behind, learning, adaptation, moving on.

Realization = realizing that there’s so much potential on your own self, that you’ve decided to finally do something about it.

Leaving behind = to leave behind unnecessary past attachments

Learning = as you age, the learning process curves more steeply than ever

Adaptation = as you learn, you begin to adapt to immediate surroundings

Moving on = …

The three dots for “moving on” - I shall leave them as they are, like a headless statue of a human body. Past attachments are like overweight baggages of the mind; one can’t leave them at the airport, though the reluctance to pay for the extra weight is there. Many would gladly pay, just for the sake of the memories. My carefree attitude is my one biggest baggage; too exciting to be left behind, too wild to be brought along with. I could put it in an other plane bound for an unknown destination, hoping that I will never see it again.

And how I wish I could do precisely that.

I had a dream, in which God appeared to me as an HP printer, telling me that the cost to get married nowadays will be RM25,000, before giving a “Printer Error” alarm just before i woke up. TWENTYFIVE BLOODY Ks!!! knn mccb!!! how on EARTH am i to be able to fork out that kind of dough… when getting married means getting saddled with marriage debts, i’m beginning to wonder why do people get marrried anyway, the cost beats out the crap out of me, and it beats the shit out on why people should be together in the first place.

apa2 pun, orang kawin sekali semur hidup la (usually), and cost somehow is NEVER a hindrance to many people who have done so… SOMEHOW. I wanna get hitched too, nonetheless. But still,  rm25000 is a bloody huge amount, and no one, NO ONE should make fun of me about this.

Anyway, here’s a top-10 list on what kind of stuff we can do wth that kind of dough if we are planning to live in an old folks’ home in our golden years:

10) sail on a cruise ship + european tour for AT LEAST 16 days
9) put down a downpayment for a house that costs rm700,000 (after u tambah total loan period for a house that should have costed around rm400,000 CASH), then pay its loan for 30 years for rm1,875 monthly.
8. get 125 master-grade Gundams
7) get 50 perfect-grade Gundams (I like Gundams, and sometimes I cunt count like this)
6) get 83 Lego B-Wings (yes again people, i DO cunt count like this…)
5) pay downpayment for a Mazda RX8 that costs RM258,000 CASH (yela lepas masuk loan dia jadi RM370,000.  A friend of mine my age sudah ada kereta ni…), pay monthly rm3,195 for 9 years
4) help someone pay his/her creditcard debts (like that can happen, but you can pay mine anytime lolz)
3) pay for your golden years in the old-folks’ home of your choice (you think it’s free kah?)
2) get a Chinese Bride (OOh you horny pervert)

AND THE NO.1 ON MY LIST…

1) Just get the bloody gaming rig already! It’ll cost you LESS than rm10,000.

No where in my blog is written that no one should get married in the first place, but if getting hitched will cost an arm and a leg and results in the person(s) involved not having sufficient funds to start a family later on (like what my mum said), please consult the Gaming Manual or online walkthrough before venturing far into the Married Woods of Eternity (requirement: Husband’s Chainmail of Patience +5 to patience, -5 to gold earned).

Got this spam email from i donno who. obviously someone (or some company) wants my dxck to get really big.

kalau fikir lagi, there’s an easier alternative for that. just throw a caterpillar to a girl and she’ll definitely scream like crazy.

idiot.

Memang anwar menang. tapi kalau kite tengok blog dier, ni yang dier postkan:

“Kami tidak akan menang tanpa dokongan kukuh dari rakan-rakan kami dalam Pakatan Rakyat dan juga sokongan ribuan rakyat Malaysia tidak kira samada Melayu, Cina, India, Iban, Kadazan, yang datang ke Permatang Pauh, bekerja keras, memerah keringat serta mengirim doa demi memastikan kemenangan ini.”

orang Dusun, Bajau, Sino+++, Bidayuh, Melanau, golongan asli semenanjung semua tu kat mana?

hehe jangan marah pok, saya saja je nak bergurau. maybe next time people would just use the phrase “semua kaum di malaysia” or “kaum-kaum malaysia”, instead of individually mentioning the races. pelik la.

Ataupun people can just say “Melayu, Cina, India, dan Lain-lain :________”, exactly macam yang tertera di borang-borang awam di malaysia mwakakakaka

New Straits Times, Tuesday 12th August 2008, pg.5

Herald telah diberi amaran oleh Kementerian Hal Ehwal Dalam Negeri akan ‘permit-breach’ kerana Herald telah menulis artikel tentang jihad yang ditulis oleh seorang paderi Amerika dan artikel bertarikh 22 Jun berkenaan Islamic courts. Editor Herald, Fr. Lawrence Andrew sudah confirm yang Herald sudah diberi amaran, tetapi beliau ingin pihak kementerian untuk memberi definasi pihak kementerian sendiri ke atas subjek agama dan skop yang dibenarkan ke atas subjek berkenaan. Beliau juga telah menyatakan bahawa isu Herald seterusnya akan berkisar tentang by-election Permatang Pauh yang akan datang.

_________________________________________________________

Saya minat membaca Herald, khasnya apabila ia memaparkan berita2 tentang Gereja Katolik dan persekitarannya serta peranan gereja di dalam isu-isu antarabangsa. Cuma bermula akhir tahun lepas (2007), artikel2 Herald telah mula berbau politik pembangkang. Mula dengan isu Hindraf, Bersih, Pilihanraya Umum 2008. Herald seakan-akan mempunyai sentimen anti-kerajaan. ye la, saya faham bahawa pihak Gereja ingin menyedarkan golongan muda Katolik akan tanggungjawab mereka sebagai pengundi, sebagai rakyat yang celik, sebagai lapisan generasi baru, sebagai bakal pemimpin yang berwibawa, sebagai penganut Katolik yang beriman. Tetapi apabila artikel2 Herald yang pada pikiran saya telah mula mempunyai sentimen pembangkang dan sesetengah orang telah mempunyai sentimen anti-bumiputra, saya telah mula terasa seperti tersepit di antara tanggungjawab saya sebagai seorang kakitangan kerajaan pusat, seorang penganut Katolik dan seorang bumiputra. apabila ada golongan yang telah mula mempersoalkan hak bumiputra dan kedudukan agama persekutuan, saya pun mulalah menjadi seorang yang 2 muka - satu untuk golongan bumiputra dan satu lagi untuk bukan-bumiputra. Saya malu dengan sikap saya ini, dan saya ingin meminta maaf sekiranya ada yang terkejut dan marah dengan pengakuan saya ini.

Tuan-tuan dan puan-puan sekalian, saya ingin mengingati anda semua bahawa saya maseh lagi merupakan seorang warganegara Malaysia berstatus bumiputra, dan saya mempunyai tanggungjawab untuk mempertahankan hak saya. Bagi anda yang mempersoalkan kerelevanan 4 perkara yang dilindungi oleh Akta Hasutan 1948, yakni kedudukan agama persekutuan, Perkara 152, Perkara 153 dan Perkara 181 di dalam Perlembagaan Persekutuan, saya tak tahu apa yang saya patut perkatakan. Cukuplah saya memperkatakan bahawa jangan disoal benda2 tersebut - LET IT SLIDE. Tolonglah jangan menyoal benda2 tersebut lagi, biarlah ia berlalu. Kalau tak puas hati dengan kuota, tolonglah minta ditambahkan lagi kuota untuk yang tak cukup dengan saluran yang betol di sisi undang-undang (i nak quote rangkap kedua Rukunegara).

Namun begitu, saya betul-betul berharap bahawa Herald bukanlah suara sebenar gereja saya. Dalam hati saya, maseh lagi saya berharap bahawa suatu hari nanti, kita akan sangat-sangat mencintai negara kita dan tiada lagi perasaan meluat antara kaum, sehinggakan kita tidak perlu lagi menghadiri kursus Bina Negara dan tidak perlu lagi menggunakan AKta Keselamatan Dalam Negeri.

Sebenarnya, saya saja je merapu pasal semua yang ada kat atas. You all tahu tak betapa penatnya menghadiri kursus bina negara anjuran Biro Tatanegara? memang seronok woo… tapi penat nak mampos, kena dengar lecture, latihan kumpulan, masok hutan, tido tak cukup. Barangkali sebab ada orang yang maseh nak buat lawak pasal hak bumiputra ni la yang aku ni terpaksa pegi memenatkan diri. you all ni tak baik tau… huhuhu…

I was asked this particular question today:

ada 4 sekawan; sorang tukang kayu, sorang tukang jahit, sorang mat magic dan sorang lagi tukang masak. satu hari, diorang saja2 masok hutan nak cari pasal (bosan la agaknya). dah dekat nak malam, diorang pun buatla khemah (nak bermalam la kononnya). masing2 dah janji nak ambil giliran berjaga takut dok dilawat pak belang, naya kang. si tukang kayu ambik giliran pertama berjaga. masa dia tengah dok bosan berjaga, ternampak la dia sebatang kayu yang selebar dan setinggi manusia. apalagi, dia ukir la kayu tu jadik bentuk seorang perempuan (gatal la tu, ada hati nak masok hutan). pastu, dier tido. si tukang jahit pulak berjaga. dah dier tengok ukiran kayu tu, apalagi dia jahit la gaun yang cantik untuk kayu tu, dipakaikannya kat kayu tu, pastu dier tido. giliran mat magic tu pulak yang berjaga. dah dilihat kayu berbaju tu, apalagi dia pun me’magic’kan kayu tu, hidupla kayu tu jadi sorang perempuan. kawannya si tukang masak pulak terbangun, dilihat pulak perempuan (yang dahulunya kayu) itu kelaparan, apalagi dier pun masakla makanan yang sedap, diberinya pompuan tu makan sampai kenyang. dah empat2 sekawan tu pun melihat pompuan tu, fuh cantik giler, apalagi semua pun claim la nak kawin pompuan tu. masing2 bagik justifikasi ngape nak kawin pompuan tu.

Kawan i yang bagi soalan tu menanyakan - "antara 4 orang tu, sape yang berhak kawin ngan pompuan tu?"

i tak tau nak jawab camana, so i bawakla berpikar kat rumah.

punyala lama pikir, kepala hotak i yg bergeliger ni pon muncul la dengan jawapan yang bernas, sebernas2 kompeni yang dok jaga bekalan nasik negara kiter.

jawapan i: kalau semua dah ada sebab untuk kawin, lastly tanyala balek kat awek kayu tu, yang mana dier nak.

bodo betul. soalan hape entah.

it’s just like in politics, every politician will have his/her own reasons to get involved in politics. apa2 pun mandat atau kehendak dier nak berkecimpung dalam politik, akhirnya nasib dier terletak di tangan rakyat juga.

sorry la kalau posting kali ni berbau politik, sebenarnya minggu ni i nak pi program kenegaraan yang dianjurkan oleh Biro Tatanegara di bawah Jabatan Perdana Menteri. saja je nak warwarkan berita.

macam tajuk, kisah blog saya kali ini adalah pasal 2 weekend yang lepas.

weekend 1 : ikut gf pegi bercuti kat rumah abang dier kat muar. i tell you dat place is very kampung-style. cool fresh air, infused with the scintillating aroma of freshly brewed home-made alcoholic beverage. Did i say alcoholic beverage? oh yes i did. and i drank a lot too. i aint telling ya where i get dat, because some of you people are known drunkards and i’m not gonna tell ANY of you. lepas tu, we went to Gunung Ledang Forest Resort. best woo… boleh mandi-manda. couples beware, jangan fikir nak buat projek di sini kerana tempat ini penuh dengan mat skodeng.

weekend 2 : my gf n i pegi desaru. best wooo… we spend 1 nite kat desatu’s D’Balau Nelayan Desaru a.k.a. Tanjung Balau Fishing Resort. chalet for 2pax di sana costs rm80/nite on weekdays and rm110/nite on weekends n public holidays (not inclusive of rm40 deposit). takda breakfast provided, since ada cafe kat tempat tu. there are dorms also, a 10pax dorm for rm200/nite, sesuai untuk family besar atau rombongan ramai2, boleh bayar murah setiap orang. pantai bersih (berbatu sikit), stagnant n dirty rivulet (sebab tempat tu tempat kampung nelayan, diorang berak kat sungai kot). anyway, the chalets are air-conditioned tapi takda air panas. approx. 90km from johor bahru.

tu je.

I saw this on someone’s Comments:

Girls are like handphones; love to be held, to be talked to,
But if the wrong button is pressed, the call gets disconnected.

Girls (women), please do not degrade yourselves by agreeing to this kind of comment. I’ll tell you why:

Handphones are a requirement, in fact many of us will not live our lives without these handy communication device. Still, they are some of us who would love to upgrade (frankly speaking, buy new) whenever a new model comes about. I can’t imagine girls (women) as handphones, I certainly will not wish my loved one to think like that too. I sendiri pun maseh pakai nokia 3315 tau, my god.

Anyway, tidak salah menukar handphone sekali sekala, cuma janganlah degrade diri anda setaraf dengan handphone, dan tolonglah pikir bebetol dulu sebelum postkan comment yang bukan2 kat profile frenster orang lain, especially kalau orang itu auto-approve comments.

i’ve been drooling at this particular upper-medium range gaming rig, and wondered how on earth am i going to afford it. at RM3500.00 a pop, I’d better gather enough money for two of these and use it to get hitched instead. But then, the increase in the price of goods has made me to believe that getting married on the cheap is the way to go. See this ->

Bridegroom -> white coat at RM700.00 a piece
Bride -> wedding ensemble at RM1200.00 rental
Food -> RM2000.00 (inclusive of smuggled beer), another RM500.00 if budget runs amok
Chairs, tables, hall -> Balai Raya rental at RM700.00
Giveaways -> RM500.00
A good band -> RM750.00
Priest’s pocket money -> RM200.00

Total Cost = RM6550.00

If i were to ambik photo kat studio, that’s another RM1000.00 minimum for good grade wedding photos.

Grand total = RM7550.00

Right now, I’m trying my best to save at least RM300.00 a month (for the BLOODY computer of course, don’t get me wrong). at this hypothetical rate, it will take me at least 25 months to get married on the cheap (fine, i DO wanna get hitched). All cash payment and NO personal loans taken. 25 BLOODY MONTHS! I could get the bloody gaming rig for half the time.

But then, marriage is a technology that never gets outdated.